I admit it’s been a little challenging to write this, at a time of a lot of change in my own life. I felt being honest here was more in integrity than just saying “Happy Holidays” and moving on.
The holidays didn’t go at the tempo I prefer. Instead, I found myself working on my school assignments right through the holidays, which goes against every fiber of my being for what I know to be supportive for me during the dead of winter.
I know I need to slow down and rest in the cold, dark months, and yet I’m being asked to be “on” and “focussed” and “productive”.
It’s a paradox I’m having to live with, as I consciously chose this PhD in Psychology program, I knew it would be a lot of work for five years, and knowing I wouldn’t like it or agree at times.
So I surrender.
I might complain a little, but I surrender.
So I keep at it… being a little extra kinder to myself, giving myself extra leeway, extra time… reducing the push.
And then difficult news hit. Bam! A family crisis.
Just before New Year Eve, my mother-in-law was diagnosed with cancer. Ironically, we’d just asked her move with us, in case something like this happened. And now, feeling very three states away. Waiting. Being with the unknown. So many questions, no answers. Meeting each day as it comes.
Remembering to breathe.
Being with a lot of feelings as the last year exited, taking so many bright lights in the world with it, including my Great-Aunt at 97 on Christmas, closing the time of a generation in my family. This time of year has touched me on so many levels. I grieve for the passing of my Great Aunt Velma and so many that have touched my life at different times in a big way, notably Leonard Cohen, David Bowie, Alan Rickman, Gene Wilder and Vera Rubin, the pioneer for the scientific proof of dark matter, which substantiates my work with the unconscious and that which we can’t see and know, to those with a scientific bend. I send blessings to all their souls’ journeys.
In addition, its been a challenging time preparing for our big move, leaving the land I’ve come to know and love for nearly 9 years. Everywhere I look, I take stock of what’s coming and what’s going. We do not yet know where we will land, feeling out to the universe where that place might be, a home where we can be deeply connected and put down roots.
And with all that, I’m also present to what is: the lovely souls I’m connected to and work with far and wide, in person and online, cherishing supporting each of you on your own journey of awakening, healing and deep listening to yourself.
Its only in listening deeply to ourselves can we find the truth we are here to be, our own unique song we are here to sing.
I’m deeply honored and grateful to each of you for a meaningful 2016.
(A “9” year, the end of a cycle, and close of an era)
I look forward to seeing where our new cycle takes us, starting with this universal “1” year!
On the personal scale, we go by a different number (you can add your digits of your month and day to the universal year “1” to get your number, ie 4+3+0+1=8).
For me, its a big year, its an “8” year. My intention all along has been to re-launch the Awaken To Your Deeper Self Program – and then I was asked to move from my home, farm and studio. I have found myself foist in the unknown, listening, waiting, and taking one step at a time.
I’m waiting to find out how much “8” energy there is to go around… I’m listening carefully to the energy and the levels of unseen support, and watching for an opening. Home is our first step, and the planets and stars say its time to let it get bigger, to match how much I’ve grown in the past cycle. Family must be held too, so this is why I wait and listen for the level of support that may be needed, before making big plans. The program will come at the perfect time.
I wish you many blessings to your New Year. May it be beautiful.
Keep shining your heart.
Love and blessings,
P.s. Come practice your own deep listening in a playful, curious way, for healing and finding your joy, during the SoulCentric Painting workshop this weekend.
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